Monday, August 30, 2010

A Source of Peace and Happiness

Children are pure and innocent. Until the age of eight years they are not accountable for sin, for eight is the age of accountability. By the time I was that age, or shortly thereafter, I had memorized the 23rd Psalm from the Old Testament.

"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for
thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever."

I used to repeat it over and over in my mind especially at night. God was speaking to me through the holy scriptures. I believed the things He was saying to me. I still believe them, but more than that I know that he was speaking to me and still is. After all, the fruits of the Spirit are peace, joy, hope, happiness, and that is what I feel. Throughout many years since I learned the 23rd Psalm I have had times of turmoil and struggle, but a testimony of the knowledge that God spoke to me through that scripture never has left me. I also have a testimony that God knows and loves me. He knows and loves all of his children. He created us all. How could a loving parent forget his child? He can't. He doesn't, at least not one glorified and perfected as He is. Read Deuteronomy 14:1 and Job 32:8. "Ye are the children of the Lord your God..." "...there is a spirit in man: and the inspiration of the Almighty giveth them understanding." In the quietness of prayer and meditation one can hear the whisperings of a loving Heavenly Father which speak peace, joy and truth to his soul. I love to hear that voice. Sometimes I can't hear it very well, and I realize that I need to become more quiet, more reverent, more earnest in drawing near to Him. Then the static begins to clear and my heart fills with peace.

An Answer
The turmoil inside me rises like a black cloud engulfing my heart and head and hiding those things that are most precious to me- tender feelings and peace of mind.
As I pray I see a light shining dimly through that vapor of darkness and then it grows brighter and brighter until it sheds light into every hidden corner of my being. I ask and it is given. I seek and I find. I knock and the door is opened.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

The Light and Life of My Soul

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. My heart is full of quiet hope, peace, and contentment in spite of the most difficult summer I have ever experienced. My husband's poor health, our lack of medical insurance, our struggling business, my auto-immune problems, my failure to find a job, and the growing weeds in our yard were enough to drive me to tears many times. My refuge has been a room upstairs where I go to pour out my heart to God in prayer, read and ponder the holy scriptures, search my soul, and listen to the voice of the Spirit speaking to me quietly. My heart fills with peace and hope. Then I hear my daughter begin to play Chopin downstairs on the piano and I begin to weep silently. There is so much beauty and happiness in this life because "all things which are good cometh of God". And the earth is full of His goodness. He is my strength and my salvation.
Guess where all the evil comes from! I can bear witness with all my soul that God lives and loves us. We are His children. On the other hand I also know that the adversary, the devil, also lives and is very busy in this mortal existence working to ensnare the souls of God's children so that he might drag them down and make them miserable like he is. He deceives and promotes fear, unhappiness, and even soul destroying sin in those who listen to him.
I'm so glad I know God. He makes me happy and gives me peace. His infinite grace and love are always with me even in the midst of turmoil. How can that be? Does God really know who I am? That is a question for another day. I dedicate this blog to bearing witness of God, my Heavenly Father and of Jesus Christ, my Savior. They are the light and life of my soul.